Meditation Retreat Journal Entry #2

April 1, 2009

We did our afternoon practice in the forest today. I wasn’t expecting the meditation to be very good. I feared it would be uncomfortable, hot and buggy. But in fact, during the first hour of meditation I felt a sense of numbness tingling in my arm. I had a moment to choose either to do something with this feeling or not. I remember thinking that I would let it overtake me and then the numbness spread through my chest, into the rest of my body and as it filled my head, I felt a deep relaxation descend on me. The rest of the afternoon and right up to this moment, I feel profoundly at ease. Sitting in meditation to “let everything be as it is”, was so easy and in fact it became obvious that I can’t help but let everything be as it is. You can’t very well let everything be as it isn’t.

 

I found that the very same thoughts that were coming and going yesterday were still there, but I was deeply unattached to them. I wasn’t fooled in the least into believing they made any difference. After practice I feared that having this powerful experience had led me to be passive. I wondered if I should have used the opportunity to make more effort instead of relaxing into the ease of it.

 

What is the relationship between making effort and letting everything be as it is?

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One Response to “Meditation Retreat Journal Entry #2”

  1. Catherine said

    Dear Jeff,

    it is fantastic to read your blog abotu a 30 days meditation retreat and very inspiring as well for us in the world. I just have a premonitory feeling that you will all get enlightened in the next 30 days.

    Please keep us in touch; this builds the momentum for all of us !!

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